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#303955* (?/23) πOld
singularity: I don't find alcohol is so much liquid courage
singularity: as it is liquid loss of bladder control
#303935* (?/18) πOld
<dcale> reminds me of the folks who left hiroshima after the bombing for the safety of nagasaki
<maplebar> did a lot of people do that?
<dcale> some, yeah
<maplebar> wow
<maplebar> that's bad luck
<dcale> I understand yakety sax was playing in the background the whole time
#59014 (491/557) πOld
<Azio> Be wary of SEO firms that send you email out of the blue.
<Azio> Amazingly, we get these spam emails too:
<Azio> "Dear google.com,
<Azio> I visited your website and noticed that you are not listed in most of the major search engines and directories..."
#65407 (376/426) πOld
pastachees: Titanic is really bad
pastachees: the movie anyways
pcat: The boat didn't work so well either
#303988* (?/11) πOld
<g0m> I think they made one for PSX
<Tappipappa> what was it called again?
<g0m> Harmony of dark shadows: Dracula?
<@DragonFogel> Symphony of the Night.
<g0m> I was close.
Syswear: Geek & Gamer T-shirts. Discount code QDBREADER
#246997 (203/273) πOld
<Annie> Vagina ^_^
*Annie (~Annie@Annie.Annie) has left #plott
<Golvmopp> o.o
<Golvmopp> A GIRL WAS HERE
<Golvmopp> A GIRL WAS HERE
<Some> What is a girl? :o
<Golvmopp> I read about them in a magazine
<Golvmopp> They are like us, but they like horses.
Comment: #plott on Rizon
#303967* (?/14) πOld
<Axxis> You can't beat the tone and longevity. Stringsandbeyond.com has good prices on them. I'd pick up a few single Gs, Bs, and high Es though. Then again, I rape the fucking thing when I play...
<Ogy> Always so humble.
<Axxis> You don't have to necessarily be good to rape it.
<Ogy> Yeah I guess that is kind of like saying all rapists are good lovers.
#303898* (?/48) πOld
<AndrewBC> My favorite password is "incorrect"
<AndrewBC> that way when I get it wrong, they remind me
<AndrewBC> "Your password is incorrect"
#303961* (?/34) πOld
*** Eric-AFK has quit IRC: Ping timeout
<@Shivers> naturally, Eric (Idle) would have the machine that goes "PING!"
#51570 (10480/12100) πOld
<fabz> I think we need to work on our communication.. one guy is talking crap, one just goes "lol" and the other one doesn't understand what's going on
<atsleek> lol
<Nefemus> what?
#60533 (6541/7889) πOld
<Zophory> dude, I just came up with the best idea for a Metal gear solid game!
<MrFizz> ....
<Zophory> it starts with Snake having to infiltrate a terroist meeting..
<MrFizz> I swear to God, if you say "Snake on a plane" at any point during this story, I'll cut you.
<Zophory> ..so, what's everyones plans for the weekend?
#42137 (432/530) πOld
<Bisclaveret> Q: How many Bush Administration officials does it take to screw in a light bulb?
<Bisclaveret> A: None. There is nothing wrong with the light bulb; its conditions are improving every day. Any reports of its lack of incandescence are delusional spin from the liberal media. That light bulb has served honorably, and anything you say undermines the lighting effort. Why do you hate America?
#12347 (279/360) πOld
<@skold> is this going to be a 'my penis is bigger than yours' conversation? cuz i have a ruler and a camera.
#303571 (211/267) πOld
<CoJaBo> There was a moth icon on a site I just visited.
<CoJaBo> I thought it was an ad so I mousover'd to adblock it.
<CoJaBo> And it FLEW IN MY EYE D:
#301722 (559/645) πOld
<Trinexx> so, while my girlfriend was taking a dump last night
<Trinexx> I burst into the bathroom wearing a rubber Nixon mask, waving around a meat cleaver
<Trinexx> while screaming "I AM NOT A CROOK"
<Trinexx> it was hilarious
<Trinexx> on a semi-related note, I slept in the living room last night
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#301149 (296/340) πOld
<+endemDan> i need to find a new job, where customers are not so retarded
<@Gusterbuster> Someone call you and say 'Can you hear me now?'
<+endemDan> no i have had that happen before, but this is even worse
<+endemDan> a customer calls in support from their cell and says she cant find the function she wants to take a pic with
<+endemDan> so i get her phone model blah blah blah, then ask what exactly shes trying to do
<+endemDan> she says 'i see pictures of people where they are holding their phone and are in the picture themselves, how do i take a picture of myself and my phone if the camera does not come off the phone'
<+endemDan> she continues with 'also how are they getting a picture of themselves from the front if i can see the flash?, like the camera is facing away from them during the picture. how do i do that?'
<+endemDan> i couldnt even respond or laugh, i was just in complete awe that someone was actually serious about this question
<+endemDan> then i asked her if she has ever looked at herself in the mirror, and freaks out thinking i just called her ugly or some shit and demands to speak to my manager
<+endemDan> so i put her on hold, get him over and tell him the story and he doesnt believe me and gets on the phone and has her repeat everything she said and then asks her about the complaint against me
<+endemDan> he asks her the same exact thing (it has been about 10 minutes since the call started) and then, then she finally gets it and understands that taking a picture in a mirror is how the people do it
<+endemDan> i dont understand how people like that function in life
<@Gusterbuster> Yea. However you get to sit on your ass all day and answer a phone
Comment: endemDan works at verizon
#96097 (10379/12303) πOld
JimBob2814: I actually tried Superman 64
JimBob2814: yes, it is.
Rawlsaur: Is it actually as bad as they say?
Rawlsaur: ...
JimBob2814: no, you're just predictable
Rawlsaur: Are you psychic or something?
Rawlsaur: ...
JimBob2814: NO I WON'T
Rawlsaur: STOP DOING THAT!
Rawlsaur: ...
JimBob2814: haha
#283880 (619/673) πOld
Her: please answer honestly, yes or no, k?
Him: Go on.
Her: why do people make fun of blondes?
Him: Yes.
#300988 (1964/2068) πOld
<massacre> Rosti, can I ask you something as a close friend?
<Rosti_LFC> you could ask me something as a complete stranger, but go ahead
<massacre> Do you reckon Emma would go out with me if I asked her?
<Rosti_LFC> errr....
<Rosti_LFC> ask her yourself?
<massacre> no fucking way until I get a second opinion
<Daz> dude she's in the channel
<massacre> no she isn't
<Rosti_LFC> yeah she is mate, look up
<Rosti_LFC> she got op'd yesterday
<massacre> fuck
<massacre> PLAN B
<massacre> spam the channel
<massacre> with text
<massacre> so it goes
<Audia> hi
<massacre> off her scrollback
<Rosti_LFC> ahaha
<massacre> FUCK
* massacre has quit (PLAN C!!!)
<Audia> I'm going to go install Windows 7 right now
<Audia> so I'll be offline for a bit
<Audia> if he gets the balls to come back in here in the meantime tell him the answer is yes
<Rosti_LFC> rofl
* Audia has quit (QUIT)
<Rosti_LFC> that was some hardcore nerd courtship ritual right there
<Daz> Oh man, I wish I could fuck up asking a girl out that badly and still succeed
#54372 (282/364) πOld
< zid`> the faster you go the slower time is
< zid`> you lose like 20 ns flying supersonic to america
< zid`> something like that
<+WhiteWolf> 20ns!??!
< syc> no you don't.
< syc> you lose 4 hours on the tarmac.
< syc> 2 hours in security.
#115317 (1052/1130) πOld
<Zemyla> Did I tell you about what my friend Joe did in auto shop?
<Zemyla> He was working with an arc welder, and the welder tip got stuck to the metal.
<Zemyla> He knew this was a bad thing, so he grabs a hammer and hits the metal to get the tip off.
<Zemyla> Then when he pulls back, lightning arcs from the metal to the hammer.
<Zemyla> The teacher notices this, and yells, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
<Zemyla> And Joe bellows, "I AM THOR!", brandishes the hammer, and shocks the fuck out of the guy next to him.
Comment: #cmc on Nightstar
#52074 (332/426) πOld
<Dogan> man, it's so nice to upgrade your camera from 16 mb to 1024 mb
<Dogan> pictures meter is just 9999 no matter what
<Dogan> it feels like i've picked up an infinite ammo cheat or something
#148598 (327/421) πOld
<LordLicorice> I made Goatse talk once
<LordLicorice> In a Scottish accent
<LordLicorice> There was some Budweiser thing
<LordLicorice> where you could upload your portrait
<LordLicorice> and assign eye points, lip points, etc.
<LordLicorice> and make yourself say things
<LordLicorice> so I uploaded Goatse
<LordLicorice> made him talk
<LordLicorice> chose Scottish accent
<LordLicorice> made him recite scripture about the End Times
#90677 (277/625) πOld
<Bobba> Hey Karg.
<Karg> Hmm?
<Bobba> Can you help me?
<Karg> Hm...
<Karg> shaz, gimme 1d20.
<shaz> 1d20: 4
<Bobba> ?
<Karg> No.
#16715 (225/321) πOld
<Omega> why do your parents hate you
<Rai> they dont like it that I never come home... I've become somewhat of a drifter of late, till I work things out with airlines/bus
<Rai> I travel to friends houses on my bike, up and down the highway and sleep where I can
<Rai> its fun
<Omega> lol
<Omega> so your a hobo
<Rai> we prefer to be called "domestically challenged"
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