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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..45678910..18Next> |
#154662 (259/473) πOld
<tgies> my mom stopped saying that we should shoot all illegal immigrants because she saw a video on the news of a guy jumping a fence and then making the signum crucis
<tgies> that's pretty fucking funny
<tgies> they all deserve to die until such time as we have conclusive mom-reviewed evidence that some of them are catholicComment: #animutation on wgiowrb.dyndns.org:6660
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#4380 (144/292) πOld
<Spork> A man looked at me like I was a pervert today. I was checking him out at the store and he had his kids at me I noticed one of his young daughters had her zipper down and you could see the print on her panties, so I pointed it out to him. He looked at me weird for a second then zipped her up.
<Spork> Maybe it's because he thought I also noticed that he was half-erect in his pants.
<Spork> Which he was. |
#64 (146/455) πOld
<Ash> Win2k! ^_^
*** Ash Quit (Read error: 73 (Connection reset by peer)) |
#56407 (254/326) πOld
<thefwf> "Hello. I am very interested in this item and may be able to meet you in person to collect the hair, or possibly shave it off myself? How old are you? Thank you."
<thefwf> That's what I get for selling my chest hair on eBay |
#101481 (2276/2772) πOld
<SaxxonPike> mmm, steak
<SLASHSPIT> you guys don't respect the environment, do you?
<SaxxonPike> I respect a good dinner
<SLASHSPIT> how can you eat that? cows are like one of the largest contributors of methane gas
<SLASHSPIT> which contributes to global warming and stuff
<SLASHSPIT> so what are you all doing for the environment?
<SaxxonPike> I eat the fucking cowsComment: #das-cove
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Lyndon B Comic: A tri-monthly comic of the deathly important
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#61053 (333/421) πOld
Kat: They should make a NetFlicks for books!
Cassandra: they do
Cassandra: its called the library |
#6208 (209/294) πOld
<skrike:#916> Ill prolly just go into work next week and kill everyone
<pozer:#916> skrike: I do that all the time.
<pozer:#916> We're hiring, by the way! |
#1600 (193/302) πOld
<Prae> <mmp> Prae! Today its my birthday!
<Prae> <Prae> wanna present?
<Prae> <mmp> yes
<Prae> I’m ping flooding him |
#47730 (244/384) πOld
(@Amnizu) SPECIAL
(@Amnizu) back me up
(@Special) tar cfz amnizu.tar.gz -C amnizu/ && mv amnizu.tar.gz /backupsComment: irc.zirc.org #ZiRC
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#150311 (728/836) πOld
l70uke: network connections says it cant find an IP address
dbbolton: open a web browser and type 192.168.1.1 in the address bar
dbbolton: what happens
l70uke: "please enter disk into drive a"
dbbolton: what the FUCK |
#30588 (87/277) πOld
* @cagey strangles the fuck out of the verizon guy
<@cagey> CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW, MOTHERFUCKER?! |
#4016 (128/254) πOld
<djglitch> i'm thinking about getting the front desk chix number just to see if i still have it in me
<djglitch> she is sexy
<tyne> lol
<tyne> u got her number
<tyne> "0" |
#1987 (200/308) πOld
<dr\gonzo> dance like nobodys watching
<dr\gonzo> work like you don't need the money
<dr\gonzo> jack off like nobody's home |
#30773 (227/313) πOld
(@johnny|aw) man, when i'm about 60 years old, i'll think back to the time when i was 20, when i could do EVERYTHING i wanted to...and i spent my time reading bash-quotes...
(@tyree) haha
(@johnny|aw) i think i should kill myself right now :) |
#7283 (156/248) πOld
( TheFlyingP) i've got a pronoucement : school is bad for your health
( noip-work ) thats an ANnouncement, f00l :)
( Fuzzy ) you need to pay more attention at school |
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Open call for science fiction prose/art
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#46189 (139/217) πOld
<Lavos> fuck, I'm grounded
<Soup> why?
<Lavos> I had this assignment in science today
<Lavos> to assign words to letters to help remember them
<Lavos> like Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally
<Soup> yeah
<Lavos> well, I had to present it in front of the class
<Lavos> and the letters were NGMAW
<Lavos> so mine was 'Nigger, get me a waffle'
<Glenn> rofl
<Mobius> ahaha
<Lavos> now I've got detention
<Soup> lmao
<Lavos> and and my teacher called my mom. |
#25389 (270/356) πOld
<Mal> there were so many people using POP3 at DefCon... it was obscene
<Mal> who the hell sends out a text password over a network surrounded by FIVE THOUSAND hackers!? |
#5272 (231/328) πOld
<django23> I have a stupid question: what does "sendmail" do?
<Epesh> django: you're right, that is pretty stupid |
#49031 (255/385) πOld
< plasmadis> marijuana is a gateway drug to the hard stuff
< pescypes> the only thing marijuana is a gateway to is me ordering a pizza |
#24166 (347/421) πOld
dergrue: what's the name of that program that gives you a random meal to eat when you can't pick something?
barry: 'mom' |
#5068 (157/299) πOld
<reub> i hate people that can't complete a fucking |
#60331 (427/535) πOld
<brisbane> I got a knock on my door and as i was expecting a girlfriend I was naked, I opened it and it was two Jehova Witnessees. Needless to say they didnt stay long and never came back. |
#55144 (198/296) πOld
<bigwoodthing> ugh what a morning
<bigwoodthing> a co-worker was all excited cuz her mom, dad, and daughter were on the front page of the newspaper
<bigwoodthing> so shes showing everyone in the office, bragging about how cute her baby looks
<bigwoodthing> she finally shows me the paper, and guess what the article theyre in is about
<taylor-made> what?
<bigwoodthing> the poverty that is gripping the area due to several large companies cutting jobs :(
<taylor-made> ...
<bigwoodthing> what the hell are you supposed to say in that situation?
<bigwoodthing> "sorry that your family is in a bad spot financially, but on the bright side your daughter is SOOOOO CUTE!" |
#56901 (15168/17046) πOld
<glowsun> I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at the zoo
<glowsun> and got mauled
<glowsun> and people were talking about how there should have been better defenses put up to prevent people getting into the cage
<glowsun> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent
<glowsun> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in |
#125781 (-89/133) πOld
[17:33] <Julia-Maureen> Hold on, my cat is screaming... |
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