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#301267 (15/55) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<segosa> hey guys, let's write a befunge program
<segosa> i'll go first
<segosa> >          v
<shawnz>            ^
<shawnz> oops
#302835 (16/22) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Somebody> Who knows, maybe you created AI, and have a bot speaking instead of you.
<fahadsadah> So what if I have?
<fahadsadah> Is that a crime?
<fahadsadah> Are you prejudiced against bots?
<fahadsadah> Brb, oil chang^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^Hperforming typical human activities
#301909 (47/71) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Sebas> Heh, so I have this "Insult Dictionary" which has witty insults for every occasion, as well as a translation into 4 different languages
<Sebas> But it seems that, although the translation is generally correct, every now and then they went for an interpretation instead
<Sebas> So "Moron" comes out as "Naked savage" in the German translation, and "Greasy bastard" becomes "Filthy Italian"
#310308 (25/27) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@swight> Ikea Bags Stuffed With Skeletons Found in Sweden
<@swight> good luck putting them back together
#310299 (19/27) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<JordiGH> I can't figure out what to name this module.
<JordiGH> misc.py it is, then
<JordiGH> Then I'll have etc.py, general.py, and other.py
<roryg_> wait until you have util.py, utils.py and utils2.py
<roryg_> "utils2.py: even more util"
Comment: Freenode #montrealpython
Lyndon B Comic: A tri-monthly comic of the deathly important
#309795 (28/38) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
GeDaMo| What's a moba?
sixthgear| GeDaMo: an RTS game where you control one unit
sixthgear| and be a dick to people online
sixthgear| those are the two main components
#309704 (50/70) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<ButchDeLoria> hey guess what I got
<advi> a boner
<ButchDeLoria> worse
<ButchDeLoria> It starts with an M and ends with an R
<advi> midget boner
#309671 (18/36) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<zifnab> one of my old wow friends
<zifnab> always yelled "GET YOUR RAID CUP"
<zifnab> so we asked him what a raid cup was
<zifnab> "So I can urinate without getting up"
Comment: irc.gamesurge.net #RedditMC
#309104 (21/49) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Killswitch> nananananNANANANAN I CAN'T HEAR YOU
<powersurge> Killswitch: is that how batman ignores people?
#309095 (31/43) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<nicks> you are going to invent a new microblogging platform
<nicks> where you can only send 20 characters per message
<Haz> twitter lets you get too complete of thoughts through you've got to really condense it to get the core of the message
<||bass> 20 bytes
<||bass> and it's all 32bit unicode
<||bass> and null terminated
<||bass> which gives us 4 characters
<||bass> so pretty much limits you to short sentences in chinese
<nicks> I can communicate a lot with four characters
<nicks> damn
<nicks> crap
<nicks> fuck
<nicks> shit
<nicks> piss
<||bass> dude
<||bass> stop
#308192 (32/58) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Ikthyrion> oh wow... finding stuff when you are drunk is really hard
<Ikthyrion> what was I looking for?
<Ikthyrion> I found a cat
<&ZachPrime> you were looking for your phone
#305702 (45/57) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<+Polynomial> my favourite pastime when I worked as a techie was putting horse porn in random system folders on customer machines
<+Polynomial> it surved two purposes
<+Polynomial> first it was funny as fuck if they found it
<+Polynomial> second it meant I could tell which ones I'd serviced before
#303934 (25/65) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< niekie> Someone said to someone else "There's a hole in your shirt."
< niekie> That was just the perfect moment for me to say "That's better than the other way around."
#302601 (15/25) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
snookums: today was just another first interview
snookums: she told me to go find a seat the furthest down the way.. so i'm sitting there and for 15 minutes i'm getting antsy sitting there so i start messing with my resume.. at that point i realised the third page of my resume papers was a coupon for yogurt
#301808 (53/79) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Flack> hey guys whats the link to that website that goes through a little animation telling you to google things
Syswear: Geek & Gamer T-shirts. Discount code QDBREADER
#309109 (51/59) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Pryoidain> ....
<Pryoidain> I just fucking got OWNED by a plastic bag
<Pryoidain> So I finished my twizzlers right and I had this 1 gallon plastic bag with a double seal thing
<Pryoidain> so i closed it up real tight and used a straw to inflate it to bursting, then sealed it
<Pryoidain> and i sat it on my desk chair and plopped down on it HARD to try and pop it
<Pryoidain> fucker shot out behind me, I flew forward face to desk, chair went backward, I fell off the desk and slammed my fucking head on the wall, and then the bag fell, still inflated, onto my lap
#297665 (34/46) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Strengths> I have this huge zit on the side of my nose :/
<subcontinental> Paint it gold or silver and it'll look like a peircing
<Strengths> that's ... brilliant!
#304575 (27/57) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
[convo about airport security]
<paul> myself, did you get body scanned or groped
<myself> I walked through gates but didn't step into the federal dick-measurer
<myself> good thing, too; I don't know what maxint is on those things
#299461 (36/50) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<fahadsadah> Write a small Windows application, that locks up and crashes (infinite loop or something).
<fahadsadah> Wait for the error report window to come up, but before clicking send, locate the report in AppData.
<fahadsadah> Fill it with the lyrics to Never Gonna Give You Up.
<fahadsadah> And that's how to rickroll Microsoft.
#304213 (50/106) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Welcome to Mormon.org chat.
A representative will be with you shortly.
Agent [stephanie] is ready to assist you.
User: Hi. Stephanie?
stephanie: Hello
stephanie: What brings you to Mormon.org?
User: Well I'm christian reformed but a lot of my friends are mormon
User: and I've been having trouble with my family but they never do
User: Would converting help my family life?
User: Is there much of a difference between christian and mormon?
stephanie: Mormons are Christian
User: I thought they were amphibians
The chat session has ended.
#172905 (-1/63) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<AgentRenegade> i think im gonna love my new highschool class^^
<AgentRenegade> during a lecture a boy suddenly stood up and yelled "Its 13:37, its 1337 time!!"
#309283 (40/52) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<&mike> Sim City doesn't count students/homeless as people
<&Seem> Sim City sounds increasingly more realistic everything you hear about it
#305810 (19/51) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<enemaman> i want to compile a book containing all of the food-related sex acts on urbandictionary
<Kufat> title: "Read This Book and You Will Never Eat or Fuck Again"
Comment: #square/EsperNet
#301807 (40/74) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<SMD>i am gonna retire now
<SMD>gotta read some more lovecraft
<SMD>h.p. lovecraft
<SMD>he was a scifi horror writer of 1920 or so
<Her>i thought it was some romantic version of warcraft
#299900 (57/95) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@pyna> i read a survey of all the ways they spell khadafi
<@pyna> theres dozens
< pgp> the only thing gadaffi is good for is testing regular expressions
< pgp> M[ou]'?am+[ae]r .*([AEae]l[- ])? [GKQ]h?[aeu]+([dtz][dhz]?)+af[iy]
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