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#307708* (?/13) πOld
* rycuda has just been offered an amp
<@Al> After being given a shock like that it's wise to have a coulomb-down period
<@mgsts> I'm trying to decide watt a suitable punishment for these awful puns is
<@OneCruelBagel> mgsts: it's not his volt, he has troubles at ohm.
<@OneCruelBagel> We should let him have some peace faraday. |
#307704* (?/13) πOld
<Daynab> Today I learned that space acted as pagedown in internet browsers, and shift space is page up. My world will never be the same again.
<Daynab> and I thought I knew computers |
#307706* (?/15) πOld
<techboy> do you know what i hate
<techboy> windows ME
* techboy sucks balls
<techboy> erm, ME, not /ME |
#307705* (?/9) πOld
<BMF54123> bluh, what the hell is wrong with FCEUX
<BMF54123> I have to load Metroid several times to keep it from crashing at a grey screen
<Inuyasha> it's a REALLY accurate emulator :o |
#307701* (?/16) πOld
<ZoFreX> Becci: how do you spell poke?
<Becci> poke?
<ZoFreX> how do you spell joke?
<Becci> joke.
<ZoFreX> how do you spell the white of an egg?
<goodger> albumen
<ZoFreX> fu goodger |
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T-Shirt Hell: Shirts you'll never have the balls to wear in public
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#307700* (?/15) πOld
<Rose> I'm on conjugation.org so I can see Spanish conjugations.
<Rose> Chrome: "This page is in Spanish. Would you like to translate it?" |
#307707* (?/9) πOld
Vespucci: God... I think I've been seeing this girl long enough that I'm supposed to get her flowers on V-Day.
Vespucci: I spend too much time thinking about this girl.
Vespucci: I don't get anything done now, between spending time with her, texting her, looking for deals on flowers for her, explaining my feelings to her. This is turning into bullshit.
Vespucci: Fook man... I heard this radio add for a dozen roses (dunno what color, don't give a shit) for $20. Can't find that florist though.
Vespucci: Fuck it. I'm splitting the difference with some $10 flowers from the grocery store on the 7th.
Vespucci: That's "valentine's day" enough for me.
Vespucci: Granted... come steak and blow job day I'm lucky to net a hamburger and a 30 second tug...
Orca: Vespucci: It must be love
Orca: you should marry her and have some kids
Vespucci: Maybe I'm better off just keeping chicks chained up in the basement.
Vespucci: Less work.
Vespucci: Well, at least less emotional investment. |
#307702* (?/15) πOld
< craige> I prefer not to say 'bug'. I call them 'undisclosed, unexpected features'. |
#307687* (?/34) πOld
<HarmoNicks> so-called life lessons in kids shows are retarded
<HarmoNicks> "it's what's on the inside that counts" is bullshit
<HarmoNicks> what you're basically saying there to people who are single
<HarmoNicks> is "not only are you ugly, but your personality is shit as well"
<Rosti> rofl
<Rosti> so you're not a fan of The Ugly Duckling then?
<HarmoNicks> no
<HarmoNicks> that story has no truth to it
<HarmoNicks> if you look ugly as a baby you'll end up being beautiful later?
<HarmoNicks> bullshit
<HarmoNicks> almost all babies are adorable
<HarmoNicks> if you're ugly as a baby
<HarmoNicks> then you've got some sort of genetic defect or something else horribly wrong with you
<HarmoNicks> and that shit ain't going to get prettier with age |
#305511 (44/88) πOld
<thelilnevshow> DAAMMN RIGHT PROUD TO BE CANADIAN! im so canadian even my blood cells are red and white ! |
#307694* (?/17) πOld
Adam> just noticed that ('0') looks like a wizard throwing his hands in the air
Adam> ('ô') better, now he has a hat
Emma> lmao
Emma> when would u ever use that?
Adam> if you were a wizard, and someone gave you great news over an instant messaging network
Emma> Hagrid: You're a wizard Harry.
Emma> Harry P: ('ô')
Adam> ^^ exactly
Emma> Frodo: I will take the ring to Mordor!
Emma> Gandalf: ('ô')
Emma> Frodo: But Sam has to come with me
Emma> Gandalf: (,ô,)
Adam> O_O
Emma> I was trying to make him sad... |
#307361* (?/49) πOld
<MaltheJ> So I'm gonna make a TV-program for children that crosses breakfast and computing...
<MaltheJ> basically it's gonna be about this guy who rides in a buss with talking, omnipoten breakfast serial... It's called the universal serial buss |
#307695* (?/18) πOld
<mcdonc> let loose the hounds of war
<Ergo^> "who let the dogs out" la la la....Comment: #repoze
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#307553 (62/90) πOld
<@hackess> I keep losing my tea
<@Novice> hackess: That sounds like the English version of losing one's shit |
#307624 (92/112) πOld
<Jargon> We don't HAVE BEer pong here in Belgium
<Jargon> The idea that you can somehow "Win" at drinking is purely an American thing
<Quantum_Meddler> So you don't have drinking games there?
<Jargon> no
<Jargon> well
<Jargon> actually yes
<Jargon> there is one
<Jargon> You may have heard of it
<Jargon> It's called "going out and getting laid" |
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#307689* (?/27) πOld
< Ancalagon> I'm sorry, I missed a conversation about pooping?
< Ancalagon> Damnit!
< Ancalagon> Ironically I was in the bathroom. |
#307497* (?/36) πOld
(discussing what it would be like if other professions got "Indiana Jonesed")
SeySayux: I'd have an idea for a quadriology centering about a sysadmin if you want... "The Bug Tracker", "The Bug Tracker: Return of Trac", "The Bug Tracker: Bugzilla's Revenge", "The Bug Tracker: Jira's Reign"
SeySayux: It would involve more violence than you think.
SeySayux: Starring:
SeySayux: SeySayux as "root"
SeySayux: Debian 5 as "The Operating System"
SeySayux: Apache HTTPD as "Web Server"
SeySayux: GCC as "Compiler"
SeySayux: And featuring a brief cameo of Windows 7 as "Incarnation of Pain"
SeySayux: "What is this writing?" - "It's an ancient tome written in an unknown language. He who can wield it has unimaginable powers over the Bug Trackers. The Old Ones had a word for it: a Manual". "Then we must decypher this Manual! It's our only chance!" "Not so fast, young beetle. No one has ever decyphered a Manual."
SeySayux: "Take the Manual now, and leave". As soon as root touches the manual, the dungeon starts to collapse. In fear he almost drops the manual, as strange, otherwordly beings come falling through the ceiling as comets. "What's going on?" "No time. Take the Manual and run." root and his mentor run as fast as they can through the narrow passages. "What were those?" "Error Messages." "Error Messages?" "Protectors of the Manual." "Aaargh!" shrieks root, as the Error Messages are coming after him in the tunnel. "They protect the Manual from those that they do not deem worthy."
SeySayux: "In here", says the mentor, when he drags root into a sideways passage. Just when they turn, the ceiling behind them collapses, blocking the error messages but also the exit. "Are they... gone?" "For now. Error messages cannot be killed. They will start multiplying, unless we do something." "What a--" "That is not our concern now. Our primary concern is getting out of here. Then we can deal with those pesky errors." |
#307161 (47/65) πOld
<jwgoerlich> As an aside, I get concerned when my wife says "let me set the mood with music" ...
<jwgoerlich> And then proceeds to play the Impossible Mission theme song. |
#301489 (178/236) πOld
<Anoria> but the replacement parts are coming out of a $3 camera from ebay, so maybe something weird happened to this particular screen. there were no polarizers in either of the parts cameras.
<Bunsen> Man, this is why we need mantis shrimp vision.
<Anoria> I'm simply dying to know what you mean by that.
<Bunsen> Mantis shrimp have freakishly detailed perception of light.
<Bunsen> Like several more pigments than us, plus sensitivity to horizontal, vertical, and circular polarization.
<Anoria> yikes.
<peer> what does a shrimp need with that kind of vision?
<Bunsen> Hell if I know. Ask one.
<Anoria> I know there are beetles whose carapaces circularly polarize light, but I somehow doubt they share habitat
* Anoria reassembles the camera with both polarizers in place so they don't get lost in case someone eventually figures out what to do with them
<Anoria> or not polarizers. gratings. whatever.
<Bunsen> Oh my, I had forgotten that mantis shrimp are also capable of snapping their claws hard enough to cause cavitation and sonoluminescence.
<Anoria> wtf they're physics shrimp
<Bunsen> Exactly.
<Bunsen> Put 'em in heavy water, and I'm pretty sure they'll discover fusion.
<c0nsumer> why have you not done this yet?
<Bunsen> Because I, for one, do *not* welcome our new fusion-powered optics-researching crustacean overlords.Comment: I'm going to start a band called Physics Shrimp.
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#307684* (?/47) πOld
<Anne> hey. let's cybersex roleplay
<zmoney69> okay
<Anne> i'll be your mom, and you be every guy in town |
#307555 (64/74) πOld
Sarig: problem with satelites is ping
Sarig: You don't know what lightspeed is until you try to game over a geostationary satelite |
#307310 (162/204) πOld
* Pryoidain is now known as MSWord
<MSWord> Oh Hi! I'm Microsoft word!
<MSWord> Hmm...I'm not really sure what you're doing here..you're using my equation editor an awful lot.
<MSWord> Oh! I see alot of numbers in parenthesis before these equations!
<MSWord> Huh...They don't quite match up though. See you have (1),(2),(3),(1),(3),(4),(1),(2),(5)
<MSWord> I can help! Let me just automatically reformat those into a list!
* MSWord DESTROYS ALL FORMATTING TO THIS POINT
<MSWord> What? You want me to stop automatically generating lists and go back to previous?
<MSWord> But..I was just trying to help!
<MSWord> Here, I'll fix it.
* MSWord RESETS ALL NUMBERS, FORMATTING, TAB INDENTATIONS, AND FORMULA LAYOUTS
<MSWord> There, Back to a blank slate!
<MSWord> What?
<MSWord> Hey why are you undoing?
<MSWord> Hey, don't go in there, those are my settings!
<MSWord> But, that's the autocorrect setting! That's me! What are you plan-
* MSWord is now known as Pryoidain
<Pryoidain> This is exactly how I am going to explain to my idiot math teacher why Microsoft word is a fucking HORRIBLE choice for a math homework submission. |
#307683* (?/29) πOld
< pipe> My electronics component store changed its website a few years ago
< pipe> *everyone* hated it
< pipe> It's been a common engineering joke since then
< pipe> Yesterday oslt there was some news on their website: "New improved website! You can now use the back button in your browser to navigate back to the previous page!"Comment: web 2.0
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#307697* (?/17) πOld
* Speed np: "Any Means Necessary" by HammerFall
* Adorable Now Playing: With My Penis. By: My Right Hand. Duration: 3 minutes 17 seconds.
<Pauwelz> Only 3 minutes?
<Adorable> Pauwelz let's face it, anything longer and you're just stretching it for no reason. Your hand gets sore, you start looking and weirder and sicker shit. By the time you blow your load you've killed too much time, your hand is nearly broken, and you're wondering, "How the hell did I find Japanese girls puking into a plate hot?!"
<Buccaneer> lol'd
<Pauwelz> Point taken
<Adorable> Then you have to clean up the keyboard, while closing off a hundred tabs while hoping nobody notices the jellyfish |
#307612 (73/97) πOld
* Schrodinger has joined #chat
<Remus> How's your cat, Schrodinger
<Schrodinger> I'm not too sure.
<Schrodinger> I'm afraid to check. |
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