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#309884 (72/128) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* Mondale (~Mondale@CPE-120-148-236-70.hdqu1.vic.bigpond.net.au) has joined #fountain_pens
<kerin> sup, nerd
<Mondale> sup nerd
<kerin> punctuatin'
<kerin> to a limited extent
<kerin> you?
<Mondale> wtf does that mean
<kerin> it's a contraction of "punctuating"
<kerin> which means applying punctuation to sentences
<Mondale> why would you need to do that?
<kerin> "to a limited extent" indicates that this punctuation is incomplete
<Mondale> yes, but why
<kerin> because punctuation provides additional clarity when parsing sentences
<kerin> and my closing "you?" is digressing to inquire, out of politeness, about whatever tragically uninteresting bullshit you occupy your time with
<jrvc> OH BURN
#309876 (81/109) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+Shawn> I've got 500 feet of cat6
<%fbs> waddafux u has so muc hcat6?
<+Shawn> fbs: Nobody was using it
<+Shawn> So I figured I could not use it better than anybody else
Comment: #darkscience
#309870 (52/88) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<doublehappy> bomb scare at my work
<doublehappy> S U S P I C I O U S    B R I E F C A S E
<doublehappy> we have to leave by the basement door now
<doublehappy> when we leave we have to go via the basement but the driveway goes right past the door where the suspicious briefcase is
<m[at]> as long as you dont taunt the briefcase you'll be fine
<doublehappy> it is an old brown briefcase with a sign saying "FREE"
#309867 (33/65) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< Clarke> Haskell is like dropping a trident missile on the problem; MUMPS and PHP are like slamming two uranium chunks together by hand.
#309850 (623/655) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<bbitmaster> bah, this is the dumbest thing ever. I broke linux mint over the silliest thing, and I am quite pissed.
<bbitmaster> The bottom panel was too small. I was adjusting it to be more manageable. I accidentally right clicked on the "+" in the dialog that makes it larger.
<bbitmaster> right clicking causes it to go to max size. It now fills the screen and I can't go to any other window or menu or anything. I restarted and it kept that setting.
* 1 hour later
<bbitmaster> I joined the linux mint help channel, the guy there helping me suddenly left
<bbitmaster> he came back and said he was stupid enough to "recreate my problem"
<bbitmaster> and now he's in the same boat
#309086 (196/218) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Charlie: next door have been drilling for like 2weeks non stop
Charlie: what the fuck are they making
Richard: holes
#309301 (81/107) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Bruno: "Hm, I should put on a podcast while I clean the kitchen" -> "Hm, Pragha doesn't seem to have an RSS podcast feature" -> "yum install banshee" -> "sudo yum install banshee" -> It's now like 30 minutes later and the kitchen is no cleaner
#309287 (94/118) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Loxus> I fell for my own prank..
<Loxus> I had made a hidden folder on one of my hard drives named 'XXX'
<Loxus> when I opened it, there were only a text file named 'HAHA! Nothing here'
<Loxus> and I forgot that I did that. :P
#304801 (42/88) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<SaberUK> Rfsancho: do soviet russia jokes make sense in russian?
<Rfsancho> they do if you reverse them
<Rfsancho> "in US of A, you drive CARS!"
#304603 (70/134) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Chroder> sometimes i touch the screen and then click on the mouse at the same time and pretend like its a touch screen.
#309307 (205/269) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< BaKamann> my cabbage is 4 gigaleaf but it still can't run linux
< BaKamann> i don't want to pay the extra fee to upgrade to lettuce
< BaKamann> this is how i see all your techy talks
#308960 (453/501) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<tomatosalad> it is 54 degrees in this house
<tomatosalad> I am so damn cold
<Bubonicfred> whats that in C?
<Palomides> Bubonicfred: printf("it is 54 degrees in this house");
#304203 (181/245) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@JC>Haha this is awesome.
<@JC>Im in sydney airport sitting next to all these really clueless people - i realised (yes i fucking realised how bored i was at
the same time) that new firmware had come out for my modem - so i telnetted in and upgraded it - and while i was at it i noticed my voip dialplan was all wrong too so i fixed that up - basically i was winning command prompt big time.
<@JC>This being an aiport and a "console" looking dodgy as fuck got some girl running to the security guard thinking i am like sending airport infrastructure results back to the KGB or some shit. Basically i was like zero cool to this chick - which is pretty cool.
<@JC>He comes over to me and grabs my shoulder and asks what i was doing i said i was "hacking the gibson"
<@JC>AND THE MOTHERFUCKER CONFISCATED MY GODDAMN LAPTOP - HE HAD TO HAVE AN IT "EXPERT" LOOK AT MY LAPTOP WHICH DELAYED MY FLIGHT UNDER A "SECURITY RISK" i swear to god - they are just getting bored - like all this money
going toward airport security and they bag a dude for telnetting his modem - when that lady next to me was probably smuggling crack inbetween her butt cheeks.
<@JC>So moral of this story - telnetting can sometimes get you nearly arrested.
#302136 (142/218) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@CESSMASTA> "rape risk rise for cambodia women"
<@CESSMASTA> i like alliteration and all but that headline strikes me as a tad unprofessional
<@dbelange> Cambodian Cooch Caper Count Climbing
#309410 (11/63) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kentari> There's a huge disaster.
<kentari> The bodies are being piled up.
<kentari> How do they identify yours among the corpses?
<kentari> That's how I ask people to describe themselves on dates.
<Caltak> o_o
<kentari> it unsettles people and gives me two things: reactions, and time
<Caltak> Like, when you're already physically there with them and can see them?
<kentari> that way while they answer, I ignore them
<kentari> and I plan my next move :P
#308933 (236/256) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Eule> "cloud" aka "I think I'll put my files on a third-party service with unknown backup, retention, and future pricing policies, and hopefully they won't suddenly charge me too many thousands of dollars to get my own files back."
#306793 (-4/150) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
[21:09:49] <Charbile> something tells me we won't see aethereal for months
[21:13:17] * Aethereal has joined
#305934 (80/144) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(duckaroosky) so the whole time you were talking about minecraft for the couple of months i've been here
(duckaroosky) i always thought you were talking about that game on your computer where you guess where the mines are
(duckaroosky) and you have to clear it out
(duckaroosky) i just facepalmed when i realized it's not
Comment: VBIRC
#302711 (33/73) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Mike: this morning i had speech class, there was a talent show for extra credit
Mike: at the end the teacher got up and said he'd like to show us one of his talents
Mike: asked for a couple of volunteers
Mike: "i used to practice ju jitsu..."
Mike: he then proceeded to put a student in a choke hold
#302651 (129/159) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ryan22> have you guys looked into getting a bug tracker. i recommend github or launchpad
<terinjokes> Bug #1 Unable to kick ryan22 [Status: Open] [Priority: Low]
<ryan22> heh
<BHSPitMonkey> Bug #1 status has changed: Assigned to Kaatje
* Kaatje has kicked ryan22 from #iphonelinux-dev (Kaatje)
<Kaatje> Bug #1 status has changed: Completed
#302263 (15/119) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
hulasikali.wala: k time to try flashing the zaurus
ressedue: arent you supposed to be on a honeymoon? :p
#301502 (52/128) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Bob: Just got a call from my mother to tell me that my "last remaining uncle died today". I said "last? I thought there were two left?" To which, she said, "Oh, [he] died last month. I thought I told you."
#299678 (50/88) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<m4tt> lol, still up huh?
<jm7316> There's porn to be watched, and damnit, someone has to do it
<m4tt> that is mighty selfless of you
<jm7316> I do what I can for humanity.
<m4tt> im not sure where we'd be without you
<jm7316> Overflowing with unindexed, unmetatagged, uncategorized pornography.
#295389 (-16/68) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@sxh> that's why i always keep the thing in my chair fully extended
<@sxh> i already thought of that
<@sxh> when my very first chair broke
<@sxh> and i was using the canister inside as a pogo stick
#240878 (-43/113) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<doc|work> hey, what happened thermopylae?
<ardchoille> he got burned out?
<ardchoille> He was fired?
<ardchoille> Got too hot under the collar?
<doc|work> ardchoille: btw, 7-11 here has giant slurpee vats
<doc|work> giant as in gallon sized probably
* ardchoille is still the king of bad puns
<doc|work> hence the change of subject :)
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