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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..891011121314..559Next> |
#126624 (2/252) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<anti-net> I'm going to bed when the Sun gets up, lazy bloody thing
<anti-net> rarely does night shifts, only in the North Pole
<max> hey, in the north pole it stays up for 6 months straight! you call that lazy? i call that caffeine
<max> then it goes down for 6 months, now thats a caffeine crash |
#126580 (86/230) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<BURNING_HERO> I was looking through martial arts videos in YouTube because I like the read the comments. I saw this one that was all telling this guy he sucked because he didn't use ki energy and his video showed real ki powers and shit. So I checked it out and it was a video of him waving around at a candle to blow it out.
<BURNING_HERO> I left a comment asking how much Dragon Ball Z he watches.
<BURNING_HERO> He said: I hope to be like Kakarot in super saiyan form |
#122028 (152/342) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
[Katami] I was little and my dads friends dog always tried to hump me and he told me to stroke the red rocket to make him stop
[Katami] and I did
[Katami] Then they all laughed at me for ages
[Katami] v.v
[Katami] I'm from alabama
[Katami] Further more, it was a lie
[Katami] That dog would not leave me alone for shit after that |
#300150 (363/419) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<kiwi_> How come when your wifes pregnant, all her female friends rub her tummy and say congratulations! But none of them rub your cock and say well done?
<Artifice> By extension, it would be your GUY friends rubbing your johnson |
#295793 (134/254) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<D-Myze> I was speaking to a girl the other day, who was like "have you seen 2 girls 1 cup?" I was like "uh, no, have heard of it though" she was like "it's not so bad the second time" I was like "second time ?!" |
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#300122 (448/584) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<Slashy> Kanye West has a new show coming out
<Slashy> No time slot, it just interrupts other shows |
#297717 (293/435) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<ChromosFel|WoW> i can't see how people feel they can judge WoW without even playing it
<Z-Ramm> i can't see how people feel they can judge crack users without even trying it |
#266625 (337/485) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
kwenda: this lady who works here is so disgusting
kwenda: fat and ugly
kwenda: she rubbed my hair in the middle of a meeting
kwenda: i stood up and left the meeting without saying anything
kwenda: went to supercuts and got a shampoo and a haircut
kwenda: walked back into the meeting and sat down |
#261528 (257/439) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<Blimey> hmmmm shall i have another cup of tea?
<Blimey> or is that a bit drastic?
<Blimey> what the hell, you only live once.... |
#121036 (10/468) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<SimonJester> myself: Yeah. I have a fascination for all things Tuvan. To find even a minor phrase book is something amazing.
<purge> I'm a fan of throat singing.
<purge> No idea why they call it that, though, since it's all in the tongue.
<SimonJester> It's not all in the tongue. Some of it is in the back of the throat.
<myself> fuck. Why is this channel +t ? |
#120265 (3/527) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<@sdr> shitting while being hungover must be like childbirth to a womanComment: #**** efnet
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#120261 (1/463) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<m0rb> you're breaking up with your girl dylan?
<dylan> haha she's opting out of meComment: #**** efnet
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#118944 (88/360) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<Wendell> Who's that?
<Texture> qdb.us random quote
<Texture> it's like chatting on IRC
<Texture> except you don't have to chat
<Texture> and you just read the funniest parts |
#303208 (373/463) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<GauHelldragon> G-Flex
<GauHelldragon> how many cubic milliliters can you fit in a bathtub
<G-Flex> what is a cubic milliliter
<G-Flex> you're going to have to ask me in units that aren't hyperdimensional |
#303156 (111/251) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<dd7> sigh
<Marcus> whats up?
<dd7> i was eating a sandwich on my electronics workstation right
<dd7> well i ended up getting bread crumbs in the breadboard
<dd7> go figure |
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sadhat: low-noise, high-signal news
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#303154 (277/381) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<pgp> i want food but it is raining and i have no escape from the rain
<pgp> oh wait i have apples
<iank> use them to construct an umbrella
<iank> so you can buy foodComment: irc.slashnet.org/#mefi
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#303149 (3/261) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<nuintari> two happy little bacteria cells have met, estalished a cute little rapport, wined and dined, enjoyed each other company as dear good friends, fallen madly in love, settled down for a night of loving mutal physical satisfaction, then realized that they are not sexual beings, said fuck all that, and then deciding that they should just remain friends, and immediately go into mitosis |
#303118 (665/849) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<fbcash> has anyone here flashed their xbox before?
<warbucks> no, but I once showed my dick to a nintendo DS |
#303101 (446/580) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<grent>
<grent>
<grent>
<hitenmaster> You don't say. |
#302976 (217/311) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
[@tank] there's a gay porn called Hungry for Hungary
[@tank] there should have been a whole series like that
[@tank] Budapest Butts, Croatian Cocks
[@tank] etc
<@JohnnyDoe> Switzerland sucks :-D
<+dlong> Azerbaijanian Asses
<+dlong> Danish Dicks
[@thechosenone] Ethiopian Enemas
<+dlong> Finnish Fucks
[@thechosenone] German Goatses!!!
<@JohnnyDoe> Inside India
<+dlong> Jamacian Jailbait
[@thechosenone] Kinky Kenya
[@thechosenone] Monaco Man-Meat
<@JohnnyDoe> Liberia Libido
<cs^> [@thechosenone] Nicaraguan Nipples
<+dlong> Oceaniac Oral
<+dlong> Penises from Paraguay
<@JohnnyDoe> Quickie in Qatar
[@thechosenone] Ravenna Rim-jobs
<+dlong> Trannies in Tahiti
<@JohnnyDoe> Uganda Urinals
<+dlong> Vacuums in Vatican City
[@thechosenone] Vanatuan Vaginas
<+dlong> This is supposed to be gay porn
<+dlong> Watersports in Wakanda
<cs^> [@thechosenone] Xin-XXX
<@JohnnyDoe> Should have been Watersports in West Bank
[@thechosenone] old country names count? ;) otherwise i can't find an X
<hellix> zombie sex in zanzibar
<hellix> wait, what
[@thechosenone] Yugoslavia Youths |
#302934 (575/685) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
Ted: Usually we get a virga rainfall here.
bob read that as viagra rainfall
ErinH: lol
Ted: sigh, bob
ian: "if you have rainfall lasting more than 4 hours, contact your weatherman"
Ted: heh
MichelleH: dare I ask what virga rainfall is?
bob: gah. now I have "it's raining men" stuck in my head
Ted: it's rain that evaporates before hitting the ground
ErinH: cool
bob: heh. premature evaporation. |
#302907 (86/194) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
hawq: link to news story "chair-maims-girl-by-anal-penetration"
Orange_Ribbon: caused the gas cylinder in the chair to explode
Orange_Ribbon: WHAT!?!?!?v Gas Cylinder!!
Manoel: Why would they need a gas cylinder in the chair?
Skynet: I was under the assumption that's how gas lift chairs worked, with a gas cylinder.
FetusChrist: Guess what I have in common with a chair
Zoidberg: Explosive gas? |
#302893 (74/170) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<@teleolurian> if i were going to try fetishes
<@teleolurian> hair spitting would be #1
<@teleolurian> making her roll up a shadowrun character would be #2
<@minipulator> i realize that fetishes are sort of, by definition, not the norm, but i'm pretty sure at least one other person has to be into it to be considered a fetishComment: #smash on BashZen
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#302849 (298/412) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
<Thinpy> Well, my first day at work didn't go at all well.
<Thinpy> Even though I'm probably the only competent IT person there
<Thinpy> well, as you might know I've been unemployed and living in my own place for three months
<Thinpy> in that time i have adjusted to living in a... relaxed environment
<Thinpy> for example, i have been wearing mostly loose-fitting sweatpants
<Thinpy> so when I need to drain the ol' bladder
<Thinpy> i have perfected a move at home by which I yank 'em down and start peeing in one fluid (lol) motion
<Thinpy> today at work I needed to pee and went into the work toilets
<Thinpy> since I was alone in there I kinda instinctively used the move
<Thinpy> only to discover that work pants, held up by a belt, do not come off as easily as my sweatpants might
<Thinpy> and I urinated copiously into my pants. |
#302837 (391/461) ↑Good ↓Bad πOld
* +skism np: Lady Gaga - Pokerface [03:46m/128kbps/44kHz]
<+Polynomial> skism you're a freak
<+skism> why?
<+skism> nothing wrong with lady gaga
<+Polynomial> 128kbps
<+Polynomial> you disgust me |
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