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#309498 (53/61) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* Clarke finds a mysterious button inside VS - which breaks the program when he clicks it
<Spock> "compile"?
#307040 (78/102) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< Tommy`> cd ~
< Daeken> Tommy`: you're heading home?
#307000 (39/83) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< Cyber> When I'm on call I always feel the need to drink
< Cyber> A LOT
#310618 (53/57) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(antomatic) Official SonyMicrosofTendo Policy On Video Game Preservation:
(antomatic) "Well, y'see... we kind of already /have/ your money?"
(antomatic) "And running servers is so hard."
(antomatic) "So very hard."
(antomatic) [End Statement]
(midas) 'Bye!'
(antomatic) 'Enjoy those consoles we sold you!'
(@raylee) at least piracy helps with archival of some of the game libraries. so if, say, the original wii shop channel servers were taken down, much of the content there would be available online
(antomatic) In 2000 years time, scholars will look back and speculate as to why so many internationally successful software titles from numerous disparate producers all bore the common insignia "Cracked by Honktronics"
Comment: EFnet #archiveteam
#310554 (110/200) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Elena>  man, an ill-fitting nazi uniform is just a disgrace. like, if you're willing to shoulder all that comes with wearing a frickin nazi uniform, don't half-ass it
<Josh>  What are you, some sort of Nazi nazi?
<Elena>  yes
i will totally nazi how people nazi
<Josh>  I did nazi that coming.
<Elena>  alright, we've hit critical godwin, that's it, shut down everything
#310347 (43/57) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Rozzie-mob> Ohok
<Rozzie-mob> Apparently when I was younger I ate the dogs worming tablets
<Rozzie-mob> But it was okay because I took the correct dosage
#307328 (56/102) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Xynth> Seriously, who starts their name with an X? How do you even pronounce that?
#307122 (41/89) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<+Nortaneous> goddamnit
<+Nortaneous> after five tries, i finally remembered how to open the run program dialog instead of switching workspaces
<+Nortaneous> so i opened the thing and accidentally typed irssi instead of putty
<+Nortaneous> nothing happened
<+Nortaneous> so i opened it again
<+Nortaneous> typed irssi *again*
<+Nortaneous> but on my third try, i got it
<+Nortaneous> opened putty
<+Nortaneous> got the login as dialog
<+Nortaneous> and tried to login as irssi
<+Nortaneous> i'm moving to a fucking cave in the woods.
#305982 (52/88) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Grievre> I just realized this was the best way to describe it
<Grievre> San francisco looks like a city designed by dr seuss
<Grievre> all the hills
<Grievre> houses are all pastel colors and different shapes
<Grievre> everyone wears weird outfits all the time
Comment: #furaffinity on #furnet
#304215 (50/106) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Juliet|Awesome> going to "bed" so I can "read" a "book", maybe "learn" a little more "esperanto"
* Juliet|Awesome is now known as Juliet|pr0n
* Juliet|pr0n is now known as Juliet|Zzzzzzzzz
<PovAddict> o_O
<Juliet|Zzzzzzzzz> stupid dvorak
Comment: freenode #stackoverflow
#304157 (66/90) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<dogel> my mother said to me last night after i asked her to sign something
<dogel> "you know how to forge my signature, do it yourself"
#303953 (43/77) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Bentley> mIRC script is what happened when bash and csh got together and had a kid, and then dropped acid and took overdoses of thalidomide
#303792 (34/76) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<emFox> Kali ma!
* emFox rips Novu's still-beating heart out of his chest and lowers his body into a flame pit.
<emFox> Bali Mangthi Kali Ma!
<Novu_Ferret> This is how I know he loves me
#303097 (55/71) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@i_c-Y> what exactly is "irreconcilable differences" for a divorce?
<@zeno> You know... one person insists on the D_n notation for a dihedral group, the other on D_{2n}.
#300320 (44/68) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
halcy0n: yanno what i fkn hate
halcy0n: .....the motion activated toilets
halcy0n: dude...you cant fuckin move!
bladezor: hahaaaa
halcy0n: you like just twist one way and its a fuckin shit water bidet.
halcy0n: doesnt help that the toilet flushing is powered by a fucking boeing 757 engine
#311245 (38/54) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<nacht> I sold body armor in a rite aid parking lot yesterday.
<Naraka> I love everything about that.
<nacht> Ohio ftw
<nacht> Are you a felon? No? Here buy this AK and 2000 rounds out of my trunk.
#310959 (66/74) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<%n473> so I migrated our first client site to our new cloud environment yesterday
<%n473> and literally the very first browsing log we got
<%n473> on our first site
<%n473> first cloud-active client
<%n473> was a pornhub search for "big ass blonde lesbian milfs"
#309886 (64/84) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Jigsy> Fucking around with computers is how I became a registered Hex offender.
#302643 (60/70) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
sunny_mousey: you are on your way to alcohol poisoning town.
SudoJones: do hety have laoiqikcer store ther
Comment: #inportb on freenode
#308489 (45/85) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<acenasir> asl angel?
<Tech_Angel> Dude, did you really just use asl?
<IT_Sean> He did.
* IT_Sean gets the bullwhip, the mustard, and the geckos
<Tech_Angel> the geckos? you really are serious
<IT_Sean> Yup.
* Tech_Angel leaves Sean to play with acenasir while she gets lunch
* IT_Sean gives acenasir a 10 second head start
<adamaze> run boy
Comment: #spiceworks / freenode
#307708 (63/103) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* rycuda has just been offered an amp
<@Al> After being given a shock like that it's wise to have a coulomb-down period
<@mgsts> I'm trying to decide watt a suitable punishment for these awful puns is
<@OneCruelBagel> mgsts: it's not his volt, he has troubles at ohm.
<@OneCruelBagel> We should let him have some peace faraday.
#307314 (55/85) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<amarainein> sudo -u bitch make sammich 2>/dev/null
<amarainein> that's how it's done
<robin> amarainein: Why do you want to become the bitch to make a sammich?
<amarainein> i was ordering her- oh, never mind
<amarainein> it's never funny if you have to explain it
<robin> sudo -u bitch is more like possessing her to make a demonic sammich as the walls drip with blood.
<robin> Lights flicker, and bitch suddenly finds herself making a sammich against her very will!
<robin> Yet charged to her filesystem and CPU quota!
<amarainein> exactly. and in /dev/null, noone can hear your screams
#306376 (55/73) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* tanuki_ wonders idly why HDSLRs don't pull rows from their sensors in a different order
<tanuki_>if we have a 10-line sensor, for instance, instead of pulling 1-2-3-4-5..., we could pull 1-5-10-3-7-2-9-4-8-6 or something
<tanuki_>it seems like that'd get rid of the worst part of rolling shutter: the diagonal wobble
<tanuki_>there'd still be some rolling shutter but it'd be distributed across the entire frame instead of being concentrated at the bottom
<dif>u should write up a technical white paper about this
<dif>instead of typing it on irc where it'll scroll of your audience's screen
<dif>i'll read it.  i promise.
<tanuki_>Consider this a very rudimentary form of peer review
<tanuki_>Talking about it on IRC allows for an instant "it won't work because [reason], dumbass"
<tanuki_>instead of the whole months-long writing of the paper and submission to a journal for official peer review...
<tanuki_>just to be told the same damn thing: "are you really that much of a dumbass?"
<cwage>are you really that much of a dumbass?
<tanuki_>Yes. Yes, I am.
Comment: freenode #photogeeks
#302974 (42/68) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Sculptor> i learnt binary numbers at the age of 7
<Sculptor> 2nd grade math
<Sculptor> commie countries always had great math courses
<CStubing> commie countries couldn't afford any more digits
Comment: EFnet#c++
#302416 (43/51) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Vasir: What's tuberculosis?
Psi: A lung disease
Vasir: Ohh, I thought it was an std
Psi: lol, no, it's transferred by coughing, sneezing, stuff like that
Vasir: I thought its when your dick is clogged
Psi: ...
Vasir: ...
Vasir: Is there a disease fitting that description?
Psi: God, I hope not...
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