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#310127 (46/58) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<mroman_> I should probably read about privacy laws in the US :)
<Jafet> Don't worry, it won't take that much time.
#310093 (106/116) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<vee> god my brain is so dumb sometimes
<vee> I looked out the window and saw a lot of birds and squirrels and I thought "yeah it's the weekend" as if they all normally have jobs to go to during the week
#310062 (79/91) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< eneasvva> I'm trying to do an variable global (with class type), I see that in C++ is made with a variation of singleton, but this variation is incompatible with BC 3.1 . There's  another  way?
< j4cbo> what's BC 3.1?
< eneasvva> borland c++ 3.1
< eneasvva> I just want to a global instance
< j4cbo> um.
< j4cbo> from 1992?
< eneasvva> yes
< j4cbo> this channel will tend to yell at you for using C++03 instead of C++11
< j4cbo> i don't know how best to work around bugs in your compiler that's old enough to legally get drunk
< jeaye> get it drunk
#309986 (77/87) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< Arelon> For example here in Beijing the pedestrian is never at fault if the other person was driving a motor vehicle
< Arelon> Even if the accident was the pedestrian's fault
<@Matthew> is that why the tanks didnt run that tianamen square guy over
#309978 (63/77) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<haq> i had this dream last night that i was laying in bed and i could hear someone saying "hey. hey dude. hey." from under the bed
<haq> so i whipped around and looked
<haq> and it was a crocodile wearing raybans and smoking a cigarette
<haq> so i tell this crocodile "bro you need to either put that out or go outside with it, there's no cigarettes allowed in the house"
<haq> dude's response is "chill out. crocodiles can't even smoke cigarettes."
<haq> then he takes a puff, blows the smoke in my face, and says "think about it."
<haq> so i wake up, laugh about it, and go about my day
<haq> well, in traffic on the way home this morning, i finally realize
<haq> crocodiles can't smoke cigarettes. they don't have lips, so they can't get any suction
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#309955 (47/53) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<grifferz> bitcointalk full of marks who one month ago were all "yeah deconstruct the state! to the moon! fuck the bankers!" then today they are "omg I put my son's education fund on mtgox, who do I sue?"
#309944 (34/40) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<xplat> man, i am just amazed at how bad rhythmbox is
<xplat> i mean it, i'm literally amazed
<xplat> not just at how long it stayed the default gnome music player while being so bad, i've come to expect things like that
<xplat> it's how they managed to avoid all the obvious and easy mistakes and find a whole other set of mindblowingly inobvious mistakes to make instead
#309837 (50/64) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<refnum> kish: last time I slept with this girl she put her dogs in the middle of the bed
<refnum> like wtf
<refnum> it was like a clear separation
<ogz> HAHA
<ogz> DOGBLOCKED
#309830 (22/36) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< MadCamel> back in the day I used to go to sleep with bots running and get an SMS alarm on my phone when GMs would show up to talk to me. I could talk back via SMS too. That passed every botcheck because everything was screwed up back then and they were not allowed to use their judgment.. even though my clients were CLEARLY automated.
< MadCamel> That wouldn't fly now. That's a good thing. Heh.
< t3st3r> Hmm, reasonable :)
< V0id> MadCamel: because now you're too old to wake up within 2mins? :D
< MadCamel> V0id: that too! lol
#309805 (70/76) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@dmd> if i had a multi-watt laser or something i would probably sit in a book depository and kill people with it
<@dmd> does that make me a bad person
<@Krrrlson> it makes you a person who has not considered the power consumption and cooling requirements
#307804 (40/58) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@timmo> i have found that smartphones have kept me from drunk texting ugly girls
<@timmo> due to their face popping up in every text
#303832 (45/63) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Kage> man remember when musicians got by on their own vocal talent rather than a digital voice filter
<ixisid> no i was born in the 80s
#300422 (61/79) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Rorschach> It is my belief that the Linux community may be defined, as a whole, as a virus. Its collective users will do everything to aid the spread of their half-baked OS but will do nothing to resolve the problems or fix them even in the worst of scenarios. The average zealot has one thing on their mind: infect.
<&Homicide> We are a cult, not a virus.
<&Homicide> QED.
<&Homicide> We recruit the ignorant masses who are disillusioned with their truths, who seek a better way.
<&Homicide> We lure them in with promises, with system stability.
<&Homicide> Once they have decided to try it,
<&Homicide> They are neck deep in a bash shell.
<&Homicide> They will fight, nay *crusade*, to fix their problems.
<&Homicide> Before they know it, the sense of accomplishment sets in.
<&Homicide> "That was difficult, but unlike windows, it can be fixed!"
<&Homicide> This is what they will say.
<&Homicide> Then they will try to use wireless internet.
<&Homicide> And the circle will be complete
#295307 (50/70) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Francis: Someday, I'm going to rule the internet with an iron fist
Duo: not with a name like Francis.
Duo: more like a delicately manicured, leather-gloved hand
StoneCypher: lightly perfumed
Duo: and lotioned.
#309398 (34/42) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< BronzeEagle> I just found a floppy disk in my desk that says "women = evil"
< Frostypants> :D
< o11c> you still have a floppy drive, and were patient enough to put it in?
< BronzeEagle> Negative and negative
< o11c> then how did you know what it says?
< BronzeEagle> It's written on the label
* o11c forgets sometimes that there is a physical layer
sadhat: low-noise, high-signal news
#308591 (23/57) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<peacetwin> i'm going to start an official political organization for masculine gay men
<Wooshey_> The Republican Party?
Comment: #gaymers @ irc.rizon.net
#307840 (41/75) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@X-LP> woowee i think i have a fever
<Jigsy> Is it Bieber fever?
<Jigsy> 'cause that can be pretty fatal.
* Jigsy loads the gun.
#307388 (51/73) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<clueless> remember when I said we'd have a government soon? well the negotiations just blew up this weekend
<horm> so no government for another 500 days?
<horm> did the prime minister not see his shadow?
#306617 (46/60) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Malice> Did I tell you Velox is back home?
<+ark0n> no way sweet
<@Malice> After five years in the deserts of the Middle East, our mother thought he'd want to relax.
<@Malice> So she took him to the beach.
#304840 (37/55) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Flickerdart> I went to an art show that my friend had a thing at
<Flickerdart> And there was a shark made of d10s
<Flickerdart> Which was like, fuck yeah
<Fax> that's awesome
<lolfighter> Why d10s!
<lolfighter> Why not pick a platonic solid!
<Flickerdart> Maybe they tessellate better than d20s?
<lolfighter> Maybe.
<lolfighter> And maybe d6s are too mundane.
<Fax> because platonic shapes
<Fax> !shades
<Fax> are for squares
<Rhona_d`Cannith> YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
#302362 (15/25) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<fahadsadah> Note to self: do not code when tired
<fahadsadah> Guess what was in my code?
<fahadsadah> Rather than #!/usr/bin/ruby at the top
<fahadsadah> print "#!/usr/bin/ruby\n"
#305955 (44/110) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< Ifrit> In a way I find it insulting
< Ifrit> If someone doesn't take the time to write full words while conversing with me, I find it disrespectful
< Ifrit> and respect them less
< Wabbit98> wtf
#310231 (85/97) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Maidenhelos> There are few times in life when "Oh shit" is more appropriate than when you accidentally find the septic tank by falling into it...
Maidenhelos> On a completely "unrelated" note guess what I did today
#309841 (21/55) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< j0h> Ive been drunk for nearly 2 weeks but jrvc might have a problem.
<@LinearInterpol> j0h: that's called being a system administrator.
#309714 (114/132) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<bizzy> i just made an ec2 ami of android gingerbread
<bizzy> now i can run my telephone in the cloud
<bizzy> its a new world of mobile data and adaptive architecture as code
<danh> i think you're joking but im not sure
<bizzy> my saas-model android will disrupt the existing mobile space
<bizzy> simply access your telephone over any standard web browser (including mobile)
<bizzy> now you can make calls even on the go right from your smartphone
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