QDB: Latest Approved Quotes
Donate! About / Browse / Latest / Random / Queue / Prefs / Submit Quote / Search

#310270 (31/51) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<McMartin> "Think of silver as an easily-portable cow that does not moo."
<McMartin> New favorite piece of clan 'advice'
<Loweko> the clan is having trouble with the concept of representative currency?
<McMartin> This is what happens when cows are your unit of account.
#310266 (24/50) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Garf> anyone here know something about chickens?
<Garf> can they, like, get impregnated and lay new eggs while they're breeding existing ones?
<Garf> it is vitally important I know because I'm having a  discussion about the evolutionary advantages of the platypus
Comment: #foobar2000
#310240 (-3/47) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<PokemonTrainer> iQQsohard, do you know what a paperweight is
<iQQsohard> isnt it like a material
<iQQsohard> but light like paper
#310228 (24/50) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sstrandberg> "It includes low-level primitives such as types, flow control, and operators"
<sstrandberg> swift confirmed for having if statements
<sstrandberg> stop the presses
#310227 (22/48) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@NWH> Random thought: Do Facebook users who like the movie "The Social Network" get put on a secret blacklist?
Lyndon B Comic: A tri-monthly comic of the deathly important
#310218 (30/46) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+kmc> my girlfriend served as an adult control subject for some behavioral research on children
<+kmc> she did live on psych studies for a year yeah
<Jafet> Is there a control protocol where you don't use people who live off being sociology test subjects
#310214 (35/61) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kmc> hm hitler probably did one thing that I like too
<kmc> he banned tubas, I guess I am neutral on tubas
<Fiora> oh! he killed hitler
<kmc> oh yeah, there we go
<kmc> thanks Fiora
<Bike> he also killed the guy who killed hitler
#310212 (59/71) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Bike> When I imagine x86 I imagine a Swiss Family Robinson style treehouse, with parts continually bursting into flame underneath as they build higher and higher on the broken remnants of what they slapped together last week.
#310205 (117/131) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kmc> the other day I bought a recycling can from amazon
<kmc> it came in a cardboard box
<kmc> i took the can out of the box, broke down the box, and put it in the can
<kmc> it was amazing
#310199 (47/59) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Phantom_Hoover> You know what annoys me about Deep Space 9.
<Phantom_Hoover> It wasn't in deep space.
<Phantom_Hoover> It was orbiting Bajor.
#310194 (30/40) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<madk> The interpreter uses an unbounded tape size, but due to technical limitations will stop being unbounded if the tape size reaches 2^63 cells.
#310192 (13/33) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<coppro> elliott: actually, it's worse right now, I'm in the USA
<coppro> where the solution to counterfeiting problems is "add more ink"
<coppro> eventually all US bills will just be solid green
#310186 (13/39) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<crystal-cola> here's a good multiplication algorithm
<crystal-cola> 1010101 x 110
<crystal-cola> well
<crystal-cola> I don't know how to do it but it starts like that
#310183 (32/50) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<zzo38> Is anyone in here who knows cricket rules and has experience?
<Slereah> What if I told you the baseball rules in a british accent?
#310271 (30/40) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< nokocode> is there a help channel available?
< Master_Lyon> this is the help channel
< Master_Lyon> for c++
< Master_Lyon> there is also ##c++-general and ##c++-social
< pakcjo> no ##c++-haters? :( so sad
< kalven> pakcjo: this channel doubles as that
Comment: freenode ##c++
Got Twitter? Follow @qdb for updates
#310254 (52/64) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<shachaf> you open the third door and behind it is an argument about the monty hall problem
#310234 (67/75) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Slime_Master> I hear damn near all of the wildlife in Australia wants to kill humans
<@Slime_Master> even something as cute as Koalas
<@Xenesis> Koalas are gross and mean.
<@Xenesis> Anyone who thinks koalas are cute has never heard them fuck.
<@Slime_Master> O_O
<@Alex_Lykos> .....
<@Slime_Master> I don't think that's an image I need in my head right now
<@Alex_Lykos> as if i would want to know why you watched koalas fuck
<@Xenesis> Watched? No.
<@Xenesis> Heard from hundreds of metres away? Yes.
#310233 (99/111) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Flashtek> I hate it when someone burns bread when I'm plugging in PC hardware for the first timeComment: #gentoo
#310229 (52/62) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< wushin> your art is very good
< bagzie> I hate it more and more each day
< wushin> that just means you're an artist
#310225 (49/63) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Proview> holy shit i'm tired of doing people's programming homework
<Proview> every fucking day its something new
<Proview> what happened to people who genuinely wanted to learn
<Proview> and try and figure it out
<GargajCNS> Proview: those people made successful projects and now the people whose homework you're doing want in on the cake
<GargajCNS> nerd kid goes to school, gets made fun of, people think he's an idiot, creates company, cashes millions, people still think he's an idiot but hey he made millions so that whole progurming stuff cant be that hard right?
<GargajCNS> and voila
<GargajCNS> app store.
#310208 (129/139) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kmc> yes Windows 98 installer, please perform a bad blocks scan of your virtual emulated hard drive
<kmc> you have no idea how completely I control your so-called reality
#310167 (132/148) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<TheGreatSparky> Well over the last 100 years we have made such insane medical and technological advancements.  I mean, we have X-Rays and ultra sounds, we can replace hearts and reattach limbs, and we can even perform operations on the human brain.  How is it that with all that in mind, shoving a finger up a somebody's asshole is STILL the best method to check a prostate?
#310153 (54/62) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Xaiier> I'm curious as to what a nuclear meltdown in space would be like
<scott_manley1> well there's no down
<scott_manley1> so it's more a melt
<Xaiier> oh right
#310127 (55/67) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<mroman_> I should probably read about privacy laws in the US :)
<Jafet> Don't worry, it won't take that much time.
#310093 (120/132) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<vee> god my brain is so dumb sometimes
<vee> I looked out the window and saw a lot of birds and squirrels and I thought "yeah it's the weekend" as if they all normally have jobs to go to during the week
The London Vandal Store, you should check it out.
save page | share <Prev1..3456789..575Next>

About / Browse / Latest / Random / Queue / Prefs / Submit Quote / Search
0.016 (3) 14,290 quotes approved; 9,634 fermenting; karma: 189.9757