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#300149 (240/272) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<ninjapirate> sometimes i hear "Eye of the tiger" when i'm masturbating.
<ninjapirate> that's how glorious my penis is
<jaban> "so many times it happens too fast"
<jaban> "you must fight just to keep [it] alive"
<jaban> thinking of that part in particular? |
#295355 (142/186) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
NewClear4: did you win the argument?
ccmods: From the perspective that I was correct, yes. From the perspective that arguing with a 13 year old kid whose voice was cracking, no. |
#294756 (21/155) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
< n0p> hey i'm looking for a php web-based front end to control linux files and permissions. can anyone suggest any decent open source projects?
<+bradD> igotrooted-0.2
< n0p> link me
< n0p> pls? |
#207998 (97/165) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<Fudoushin> I must've gotten into the Japanese language for the stupidest reason...
<Fudoushin> I like anime, Japanese video games (RPGs mainly), and manga.
<Fudoushin> So I majored in it in college. Which is really not that far removed from majoring in African-American Studies because you enjoy '70s blaxploitation films... |
#152796 (-31/125) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
< madsara> I've found that if you take the average, normal google images search term - say "butter spray", and add the word "gay" to it... the results are completely different.
<@LadyNikon> madsara: well you are changing the data
< madsara> Heh, I love how everyone takes me so literally.
< madsara> Really, is that how it works?
< madsara> ... although I don't think I've ever going to use buttery spray again. |
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#151230 (111/161) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<LSnK> Defrag is one of those programs that gets more and more shit with each version of Windows.
<LSnK> 98: Real time view, you can see what it's doing and might even learn something.
<LSnK> XP: Boring line.
<LSnK> Vista: Never used it
<LSnK> I'm guessing it doesn't show anything at all.
<Falc> It's just a spinning disk.
<Falc> If Microsoft made cars you'd have a 'Hit speed limit light'
<Falc> As opposed to a conventional speedometer. |
#301516 (196/232) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
* nuintari facepalms
<nuintari> i never thought this would actually happen
<nuintari> I just had a customer ask if we used IP addresses
<nuintari> the ensuing discussion turned into him _demanding_ that we not make him use an IP address, because they made him vulnerable to attack
<nuintari> no amount of calm explaining was reaching him, so I start talking extremely sarcastically
<rm-rf> what would he like to use?
<brad> postal addresses!
<brad> maidenhead grid squares!
<nuintari> "no sir, you sir, if you choose not to use an IP address, what happens is, the data packets arrive to your computer on the backs of very small, hard working amoebas"
<nuintari> I disabled him from DHCP.... let him never get an address, and said, "but unfortunately, those little bastards have been on strike for years, your choices are IP address, or cancel service"
<nuintari> then I told him that this was by far and wide, the dumbest request I had ever heard |
#300759 (141/179) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
tfpen: kind of ironic that a "full service ad agency" outsources their site
tfpen: unless this is your employer...
nomercy: my entire career is doing websites for people who say they do websites |
#300671 (178/228) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<DCoder> cute
<DCoder> my Amazon.co.uk recommendations consist of C++, Hacking, and Malware Forensics books
<DCoder> ...
<DCoder> and a Zapf Creations Barbie
<DCoder> wtf |
#300549 (100/196) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<@ChanOP> now I have proof beyond a shadow of doubt that voiklis has way below average intelligence
<voiklis> screw u chanOp, i passed my IQ test
<voiklis> 104 is my IQ
<voiklis> so up yoursComment: ChanOP is a Services bot.
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#294867 (27/163) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<tetsu2051> (url to girl on facebook)
<tetsu2051> look at this
<packeterror> your so smitten
<tetsu2051> yes I am
<tetsu2051> that's why she should be mine
<tetsu2051> look at those eyes...
<tetsu2051> the eyes of a tiger
<tetsu2051> I want to
<tetsu2051> I don't know what I want to do
<tetsu2051> but damned if it probably involves my penis |
#294828 (143/179) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<PurityOfEssence> I was at the gym, and I was looking at the distance left: 1km, 500m, 250m, 125m ..
<PurityOfEssence> this is how all mathmo's nightmares go
<PurityOfEssence> a fear of infinite sums diverging
<PurityOfEssence> you'll never get there, just keep getting half way closer
<PurityOfEssence> damn zeno |
#300732 (33/209) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<+Jason_Voorhees> was chatting with a chick on dalnet..wouldnt send me a pic
<+Jason_Voorhees> so i asked her what she likes to do for fun
<+Jason_Voorhees> and she replied eat ice creamComment: #iwwf on irc.i-wwf.net
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#297721 (135/207) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<Artifice> Whoever reminded me of bash.org: Fuck you, I just wasted 2 hours, and I'm not done yet |
#296105 (119/181) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
Forggy: my kitten is almost cat sized now
CorbinFox: uh oh, better put it in the freezer then. the cold makes things contract
CorbinFox: that way you can keep it as a kitten forever!
Forggy: you can't play with my kitten anymore ok?
CorbinFox: aw :( |
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sadhat: low-noise, high-signal news
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#295055 (159/205) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
< aLExVP> my pal just had the most freaky experience of the week
< aLExVP> we're running a small VPN network around here, normally it is a relatively quiet project
< aLExVP> about an hour or so ago he got a call from someone else on the vpn
< aLExVP> he was asking around because he and other people were being port-scanned over the net, and he was wondering if anyone else knew something about it
< aLExVP> because we normally don't port scan each other over the vpn
< aLExVP> now he was just having a little private lan party with some friends
< aLExVP> (yes he invited me too but i have a test next week and a shitload of work ahead)
< aLExVP> anyway
< aLExVP> looking around a bit they traced it to his vpn connection
< aLExVP> and after looking around a bit more they found out the scans were coming from one of the windows systems at the party
< aLExVP> the system was a mess. no anti-virus on a budget gamer pc
< aLExVP> he has a router providing VPN access to his home net
< aLExVP> they traced the source of the attack on the windows box to an IRC bot net, and from there back again to his own connection
< aLExVP> further on to his wireless router
< aLExVP> and, interrestingly, to the car in front of his house |
#270335 (182/206) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<@[midas]> I remember calling the Nintendo Tip Line once for Castlevania II though
<@[midas]> Some spot where I had to crouch to make some stairs appear got me stuck
<@[midas]> I still remember their old phone number
<@[midas]> 206-885-7529
<@[midas]> I don't know my sister's birthday, but I remember the Nintendo Game Assistance Hotline |
#220553 (29/133) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
Grim: I'm gonna go shower though
Grim: I'll be back later
Dexi: wtf? since when do you shower!?
Grim: shut up! it's the 30th
Grim: that's always when I do it |
#301509 (230/262) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<t0mato> anyone here knows how fast will my computer run after a registry cleaning?
<x5ga> We have a formula to calculate the percentage of speed gained
<x5ga> (E*c/100)*a
<x5ga> E is the number of errors cleaned
<x5ga> c is the number of cores your CPU has
<x5ga> a is 0 |
#301439 (88/168) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<hgl> !decide sims
<vurl> Yes
<hgl> ehehe
<Sebas> It's ironic that you get someone else to make the decision for you to play a game that mainly consists of you taking someone else's decisions. |
#301418 (155/239) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<VoxPVoxD> I see a half dollar coin every once in a while
<VoxPVoxD> I think it's jfk on them
<VoxPVoxD> which is a wasted opportunity
<VoxPVoxD> we had a great reason to finally have one of those cool coins with a hole in it |
#301251 (82/194) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<timmo> anytime i yell at a woman and im really angry i think CUNT
<timmo> i only say it half the time though
<timmo> its like the a bomb of yelling at a woman
<snow_> i've had worse experiences calling a girl fat than a cunt
<timmo> how about you fat cunt
<snow_> haven't tried that one
<timmo> you know, cover your bases
<Alphamaze> In my experience, calling a girl a cunt will get her angry, while calling her fat will make her sad.
<Alphamaze> Calling her a fat cunt will result in a woman that is confused about her emotions.Comment: EFnet #geekissues
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#300712 (175/245) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<DragonFogel> Fun fact: Right now, there is more public support in the US for legalizing marijuana than there is for the Republican Party. |
#300636 (277/319) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<@mikesch> Google Wave was built to show younger people how older people feel when they try to use the internet. |
#300628 (194/236) ↑Funny ↓Not πOld
<ttvd> my gf said if we build more solar panels the sun energy will be consumed faster o.O
<FOXX> Dump her.
<ttvd> no she's pretty smart actually.
<ttvd> although i remember she asked me how deaf read... hmm
<FOXX> Cognitive dissonance there, ttvd? |
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