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AllBestWeekMonthRandom<Prev1..37383940414243..311Next> |
#309483* (?/11) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<gizmoguy> I'll abuse you in a second
<gizmoguy> wait, that came out wrong
<m0unds> ... |
#309482* (?/171) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<uiysum> So the wife and I noticed our baby acting more sentient. We are both in agreement that she leveled. #RPGNerds |
#309479* (?/78) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
--> Prsm (~quassel@<snip>) has joined #themanaworld
< bigcrunch> wb
< Prsm> did it work
< bigcrunch> you're here
< Jaxad0127> Looks like it.
< Prsm> whew
< Prsm> i took notes this time, sucks being old
< bigcrunch> beats not getting older
< Prsm> true
< Jaxad0127> WHo doesn't get older? O_o
< bigcrunch> dead people |
#309476* (?/117) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<miceiken> Ate alphabet soup today. I choked on the D. |
#309470* (?/32) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<curses> i just ate a cactus =)
<Lestat> and i hope you took the spines off:p
<curses> yeah
<Lestat> i don't know how people can do that
<Lestat> just pop it in and chew
<Lestat> uyggghh
<curses> tastes like MDMA
<curses> MDMA is the new chicken |
#309469* (?/49) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
mfrost503: child labor laws don't apply in diaper factories
mfrost503: it's the most adorable place to work
jcarouth: i doubt that
jcarouth: i live in a diaper filling factory
mfrost503: come on a baby with a hat pulling a lever
mfrost503: with a lunch pail with a bologna sandwich in it
mfrost503: named Earl
jcarouth: wat
mfrost503: cute right
mfrost503: the kid is earl, not the sandwich
dcousineau: but I want the sandiwch to be called earl
mfrost503: ok fine |
#309467* (?/37) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
* robacarp drops bass
robacarp ) hm.
robacarp ) it didn't "bass" right...
Hily ) how do you bass right?
sgrace_wrk ) Hily: Well, you catch one first.
sgrace_wrk ) Then you drop it.
sgrace_wrk ) The tricky part is to drop it at the right time.
Hily ) but they wriggled so hard
sgrace_wrk ) Yep.
sgrace_wrk ) They are slippery suckers.
robacarp ) that is why it is tricksyComment: #sparkfun @ irc.freenode.net
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#309464* (?/27) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<TheBadSpoon> seeing yahoo answers today makes me glad my previous account got banned for posting a link to meatspin |
#309462* (?/44) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
Richard> Did you bother refreshing?
David> No, I didn't refresh. I stood up, jumped up and down 3 times and soiled myself.
Richard> Well, did it at least start to rain after you did that?Comment: While trying to figure out why a certain HTML wouldn't display
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#309459* (?/38) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
< kebles> overheard my 12 year old brother on skype say "i wish i was a jew, i could get away with so much more" |
#309458* (?/43) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
< wushin> <link to SedlecOssuaryEntrance.jpeg>
< wushin> I wish my hallways looked like that
< meway> I wonder how illegal it would be to have a shandalear made out of human remains :|
< wushin> not very
< wushin> human remains are cheaper then you think
< meway> I want some blood stained ones with flesh leather still on them.
< wushin> It's more the quantity that will kill ya.
< meway> now how cheap are they?
< wushin> skulls are only a couple 100
< wushin> the rest are 50-70$
< wushin> Full skeletons can come cheaper
< wushin> sometimes more
< wushin> but they are free if you know how to make human remains.
< wushin> I got a recipe:
< wushin> 1) Stab
< wushin> 2) Repeat |
#309456* (?/33) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<thetruthisoutthe> what does MF2 stand for ?
<thetruthisoutthe> 0xAB, 0x83 MF2 keyboard
<graphitemaster> MF2 = Mother fucker x2
<thetruthisoutthe> yeah i was thinking about that too :)
<shikhin> :D
<thetruthisoutthe> ID? it is a motherfucking keyboard you
<graphitemaster> the 2 could be short for PS2 :P
<graphitemaster> so, "it's a mother fucking ps2 keyboard"
<thetruthisoutthe> yeah
<thetruthisoutthe> glad we figured this outComment: #osdev freenode
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#309455* (?/34) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<graphitemaster> man, I just had the greatest fucking realization ever
<graphitemaster> imagine I was dating Emma Watson (not possible, but imagine it)
<graphitemaster> if anyone ever insults me, or pisses me off, or calls me wrong
<graphitemaster> I could just reply with: "what ever, I'm fucking Emma Watson"
<graphitemaster> and I'd win every argument ever
<graphitemaster> no one could compete with that. |
#309452* (?/33) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
< Frostypants> !spank BronzeEagle
< elanore> Error: "spank" is not a valid command.
< Frostypants> !smooch BronzeEagle
< elanore> Error: "smooch" is not a valid command.
< BronzeEagle> alt+8
< Frostypants> !savemefrom BronzeEagle
< elanore> You've given me 5 invalid commands within the last minute; I'm now ignoring you for 10 minutes.
< Freeyorp> Denied.
< Frostypants> I see elanore is mathematically impaired
* Frostypants wonders what "10 minutes" means to elanore
< Freeyorp> She was just that mad with you.
< Frostypants> oh, right. She's female.
< Frostypants> Well, I'm used to that, then.Comment: #themanaworld
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#309448* (?/38) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
luz | yeah and same are silly
yeah | yeah
same | same |
#309445* (?/32) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Depp>: ... Your turn, YE
<YE>: ohthisisgoingtobefun
<YE>: *ahem*
YE puts on reading glasses and sits on his leather chair by the fireplace.
Depp sits back
<YE>: once upon a time in a far away land, there lived a gentleman by the name of dinderflan mccuntyshorts.
<Protopulse>: ohboyherewego
<YE>: dinderflan was but a humble cobbler in his village, cobbling for free for the peasants and being an overall wonderful citizen.
<YE>: one day, however, a shady figure ventured into the village, battle-scarred and cloaked in dark robes, his eyes black as night and his hair like the mane of a shadowy lion.
<YE>: he ventured to dinderflan's workshop, where dinderflan was cobbling the day away.
<YE>: the man went up to dinderflan as he was working.
<YE>: "dinderflan mccuntyshorts," the man stated formally.
<YE>: dinderflan looked up, shocked at the beastlike growl that came from the man's words.
<YE>: "yes?" dinderflan's voice trembled, looking the man straight in his black eyes.
<YE>: "you are the most powerful wizard in all the land," said the man, "and i am here to kill you."
<YE>: dinderflan stared at the man in shock. he did not practice the art of the majykks in any sort!
<YE>: but before dinderflan could object, the cold, silver blade of a dagger glinted just centimeters away from his eyes.
<YE>: dinderflan jolted upward, jumping back against the wall and kicking his cobbler's stool toward the man. he took a few more steps backward, cautiously. but alas, dinderflan was cornered.
<YE>: the dark man rose the dagger without a word. dinderflan could feel his blood boil, his heart beating like a rabbit. he shut his eyes, certain of his untimely fate.
<YE>: but in the darkness behind dinderflan's eyelids, a sound was heard from the outside world.
<YE>: a faint gurgle, similar to that of which was produced when dinderflan's shoepolish cauldron was set to a boil, and then an uncomfortable silence.
<YE>: dinderflan did not feel the icy dagger piercing his skin, nor did he hear the sound of black robes shuffling on the floorboards, or the growl of his assailant's voice.
<YE>: he opened his eyes.
<YE>: on the ground in front of him was the dark man, turned inside out from the rectum.
<YE>: "fuckin'... asshole..." dinderflan heard the man gurgle, his veiny insides that were now his veiny outsides pulsating with pain and fury.
<YE>: dinderflan stared in horror as the man let out his last breath. his intestines spilled out, and blood and other thick juices were seeping through the floorboards. dinderflan could hear the dripping of the fluids echoed from the attic below.
<YE>: seconds passed. they turned into minutes, which turned into hours.
<YE>: the sun was setting. a putrid, festering anal stench had filled the building and was heavy and musty in the air.
<YE>: dinderflan had not looked up from his hands the entire time.
<YE>: "i did this..." he had continually muttered to himself, "i... did this..."
<YE>: it was night now. flies had begun to swarm the dark man's inhumanly disfigured body, their numbers growing as the agonizing minutes passed.
<YE>: dinderflan had been standing for so long that his knees were weak. his arms had been outstretched before him for so long that they felt as if they were bound by heavy shackles. he could not move his hands, which were still open in front of him. his eyes were streaming tears from the stinging odor.
<YE>: "i did this..." his voice strained once more.
<YE>: dinderflan was but a humble cobbler, and he did not know many things. he did not know why the sun set at dusk and the moon rose in the evening. he did not know what love was, or what else the world had to offer.
<YE>: he came from a relatively uneducated village, so dinderflan did not know arithmetic. he struggled to read, and could barely write, his hands constantly weary from cobbling.
<YE>: dinderflan knew so little, but it was then that he realized he knew far too much.
<YE>: for the first time in what seemed like centuries, dinderflan closed his eyes.
<YE>: "i..."
<YE>: "...did this..."
<YE>: suddenly, dinderflan felt a wet warmth envelop his being as a comfortable darkness set in. frenzied sounds filled his ears, but were swiftly overshadowed by a slurping noise.
<YE>: dinderflan's eyes were closed. there was a silence that he had never experienced, now. he was numb and utterly sedated.
<YE>: "i did this."
<YE>: and he could experience no more.
<YE>: moral of the story: don't be a wizard.Comment: One time, my friends and I decided to tell bedtime stories. Then it was my turn.
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#309435* (?/28) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<SquidDNA> I had this girl come to the classroom while we were grading
<Ramrod> and she threw herself at you
<Cable|Laptop> Oh I'm sorry, I can't hear you because your voice is bouncing off my chiselled torso
<SquidDNA> She was having kittens in the hall because she had missed turning in an assignment and the submissions link was gone because it had expired
<SquidDNA> But she was like
<SquidDNA> When I say having kittens do you understand
<Kalimac> ... no
<Pocktio> This girl birthed kittens?
<+OhJohnNo> "she was LITERALLY having kittens"
<Cable|Laptop> It's easy
<SquidDNA> There were infant cats falling out of her vagina
<+OhJohnNo> ahahahaha
<Kalimac> was she pregnant by a cat?
<Pocktio> That seems like a pretty big science thing
<Cable|Laptop> LOL
<halko> :D
<SquidDNA> No, it
<SquidDNA> s an idiom I picked up somewhere, just very very upset
<SquidDNA> shaking and crying and shit
<Lleman> she shat cats? o_O
* +OhJohnNo is prepared to fall over
<Lleman> i need more spirits
<Kalimac> and someone somewhere has that as a fetish |
#309431* (?/19) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
< Astaroth> computational biology
< Astaroth> makes more sense drunk |
#309430* (?/20) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
< nuez_jr> dang
< nuez_jr> never played with curl before. I knew it was for some sort of networky thing, but ... dang
< surio> nuez_jr: <run-your-command> | curl -F 'sprunge=<-'sprunge.us
< surio> Is that what you are looking for ?
< surio> You will get a url
< nuez_jr> no, really just needed to copy over my SSH public key
< nuez_jr> but I need to sit me down with curl and understand it better
< nuez_jr> over coffee.
< nuez_jr> take curl to dinner and a movie
< nuez_jr> drinks at my place
< surio> stahp!
< surio> we don't need to hear the restComment: #crunchbang-offtopic
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#309429* (?/28) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
* Lilly applies glitter to ktemkin[work]
* Turaiel watches as ktemkin bursts into flames
<Turaiel> He has a negative reaction to happy things. You should have expected this.
<ktemkin[work]> Why do you assume I have a negative reaction to happy things?
<Turaiel> Because you just burst into flames when covered in glitter.
<ktemkin[work]> Glitter is not a happy thing.
<ktemkin[work]> It gets /everywhere/.
<Turaiel> Glitter is ALWAYS HAPPY
<Turaiel> When it gets everywhere it's just spreading the happy like a HAPPY CANCER
<Turaiel> Soon your life is overrun with happiness and no amount of vacuuming will make it go away completely
<ktemkin[work]> I am going to call the mental hospital, and they are going to take you away.
* Turaiel tosses glitter everywhere!
<Turaiel> WHEEEEEComment: #twokinds on Nightstar
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#309424* (?/17) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<enkieWorking> I feel ever so awkward using the abbreviation Coc so often
<Markaci> What does Coc stand for?
<enkieWorking> cocaine
<enkieWorking> what else?
<enkieWorking> technically cocaine hcl
<Markaci> ;)
<enkieWorking> versus cocaine methiodide, a charged analog that does not cross the blood brain barrier and mimics some of the peripheral actions of cocaine on the body
<enkieWorking> but that's probably too much info
<Markaci> Saturday morning Coc conversations with enkieWorking
<enkieWorking> well its more like Coc-AM (Coc)Comment: PhD in neuroscience
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#309422* (?/21) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
18:50 <~jmz> i'll break out the pentagram you get the acid
18:51 <~luke> safe
18:52 <~luke> I'll hold a disk drive up to a magnet and call upon eris to etch
a depiction of the future in the ferrous metal
18:52 <~luke> plug it back into the machine and find it booting to plan 9 |
#309418* (?/15) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<csregexbot> <Arbition> Welcome to the hivemind Mason_, where our conversation is dick and affects the fabric of the universe
<Arbition> the universe is full of holes
<Muttonhawk> Just waiting to have dicks regexed into them
<Arbition> We must put our dicks in each and every one of them
<Arbition> black hole?
<Arbition> In goes the penis
<Muttonhawk> Once you go black, you never go back... literally |
#309416* (?/21) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<zdamien> http.../why-do-mosquitoes-prefer-some-people-to-others/
<zdamien> bad: pregnancy, vegetarian, having alcohol breath
<aldeka> great combination
<xxv> conveniently two of those are mutually exclusive
<aldeka> yeah, vegetarians don't reproduce |
#309412* (?/18) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<sp33chy> Facebook stole my bike |
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